Category Archives: Denizens of the Internet

fscking spammers!

http://blog.dreamhost.com/2006/08/16/you-cksckn-spammers/
I found this while perusing another blog, and since it’s so similar to stuff that I have dealt with in the past, I thought it was worth a giggle for y’all. This “nice man” was concerned about some spam he got, so he decided to call in to the hosting company he felt was responsible.
Note: I am making no judgments about whether or not the spam was really originating from the company in question, just giggling at the voicemail and the blog post.
Note 2: Please take the warning about language seriously. This “nice man” has a worse potty mouth than me.
Note 3: Doesn’t the bleeping make you giggle? Cheap headphones as bleeping mechanisms FTW!

Remember Mister Conspiracy Theories?

He’s back… do you remember him?
Mister-needs-an-aluminium-hat called again today. Unfortunately (yay!) I did not have the “pleasure” of talking to the nice man this time, but I thought y’all might be interested in his current theory.
Hurricane Katrina was organised by the government to initiate the “New World Order”. *gasp*
Apparently, the US government used microwaves to create Hurricane Katrina, so the suffering could create more of the “dark energy”. Makes me rethink my Lean Cuisines, how about you?
Also, just in case anyone is from NYC, the president will declare martial law there by the end of the business day. Better get out now. Wouldn’t want to be sent to one of those internment camps! lol!

New Category of Fun!

I know I have a tradition of writing all about it here when I do something incredibly stupid (like sitting at the wrong table or showing off my ass to the office) so I thought it would be fun to highlight some OTHER stupid people. Well, maybe not so much stupid, as just plan nuts.
This idea is shamelessly stolen from Jules’ entertaining series “The People of New York”. Read her blog. It pwns.
I am going to start off this new category with two entries that are currently being written. They are:
It’s…Invisible Libel
Attack of…the Dessie Clone
I hope y’all like ’em. 🙂

It’s…Invisible Libel

This was actually one of my co-workers, although I overheard the call.
This nice man called to say that there was “slanderous and libellous” content on the forums of a site we host.
When asked where said content could be found, the customer reported that there were “white spots on the posts with his name on them” with the offending content.
The tech on the phone dutifully searches the site, and finds a couple of threads under his name (note, the guy had an extremely common name). He checks code, he highlights the white spaces, and there is NO place on that site where his name actually appears.
Now, he says, well, its in invisible text.

At this point, we are forced to ask the question:
If someone libels you in invisible text, did it ever really happen? If the libel does not exist, does the customer exist? Do any of us exist?

Attack of…the Dessie Clone!

This is a call I actually took. I spent about an hour on the phone with the guy. This customer wanted to make me aware of several things, to include:
1. The New World Order is coming, with George Bush Senior being the beginning of the change.
— Not really sure what this one is supposed to mean? Me either.
2. There was a tsunami in Southern California that the government covered up. Apparently it caused mass devastation up and down the coast. I didn’t notice it apparently because I died and was cloned. Look at me go. It’s a Dessie Clone!
3. The government is aiding and abetting the Chinese in coming across the Canadian and Mexican border. They are building internment camps in an unspecified location to house all Americans.
These internment camps will be used to clone US citizens to create “dark energy” for weapons. They will be implanting bad memories into the clones, as apparently this energy is created from fear???
4. The only place to go for “real news” is Art Bell.
5. If I don’t open my eyes to the war in Iraq not actually happening and being a distraction from the aliens being here, (Iraq’s a soundstage!) when the aliens take over, I will be used for their experiments.
This went on for an hour. I don’t think aluminium hat and medication even covers this guy…